My PARENTS… My GOD…
It was a holiday today yet so hectic…. it was really… I had a good afternoon nap, still I am feeling very tired…. probably because of the humid weather … it was a damn hot day… today. I was not in the office AC, so I might have felt it, mamma papa feel it all throughout the day, all 7 days … that is why I am buying them an AC … I have always wanted to give them my everything in my best possible way.
When we were kids, they never hesitated to buy us things that we demanded then why should we even think of thinking to give them anything … I don’t know why many of us after growing up think 1000 times before giving anything to our parents. Just because we have started earning, just because we are capable of living of our own, just because we can fight with our own life, just because we have started thinking on the lines that we are mature enough to take our own decisions…. No it is nothing like that; it is just that we have started modernizing ourselves like people in the West, where parents let their children live their life after 18 on their own…. But we are not like them, our culture is different, we have a very different tradition, strong bonding of love, we still believe in living in joint families where even if you cough once, your whole family is standing beside you. We don’t even feel bad listening to their scolding.
I cannot tolerate anyone abusing their parents for any reason. I simply hate those people. How can anyone forget their responsibilities towards them? Parents never forget their responsibilities. They are always with us whether in good or bad times. They don’t even think of keeping us away from their blessings. Then how can we deprive them from our presence and love?? I really feel bad for people who have grown up without parents. For me they must have done something really bad in their previous life that they have been penalized so roughly.
To me, my parents are my God on the earth and I will always live for them.
-NKJ
Well it’s not at all about modernization my friend… it’s about perception. I do agree to whatever you have written but there are some more facts. It’s the responsibility of every parent. Parents again are human beings only. It’s not necessary every time they are right, whatever they do or say is correct. It’s our moral duty to let them know the right scenario. Today times have changed we live in a modern world. We only accept and adopt those policies which we feel are favorable to us, for the rest we start blaming the modern culture. This is not correct. If you think that drinking beer makes you relax you’ll adopt this modern value? But you don’t have guts to sit in front of your parents and drink with them. But can’t do that…this is called hypocrisy my friend. When you live with your friends out side your home they become your family. They will always help you no matter what the problem is. So it’s not about living in joint family. It’s not necessary that only your blood relations will come up for your help. It’s about love…where there is a love and bonding that person will help you no matter weather you have a blood relation with that person or not.
The point which matter most is that you always love and respect them from bottom of your heart irrespective of where ever you live in this world. If people start living with their parents and start thinking that they are keeping their parents away from them. Then you won’t find anybody applying for the defense forces. We do have our other responsibilities towards friends, spouse, society, nation and planet as we have our responsibilities towards our parents. We are a new generation, our parents have given us the best education. We should be thankful to our parents and god for everything they have done for us but at the same time we should not be hypocrite…and face the reality.
Well it’s not at all about modernization my friend… it’s about perception. I do agree to whatever you have written but there are some more facts. It’s the responsibility of every parent. Parents again are human beings only. It’s not necessary every time they are right, whatever they do or say is correct. It’s our moral duty to let them know the right scenario. Today times have changed we live in a modern world. We only accept and adopt those policies which we feel are favorable to us, for the rest we start blaming the modern culture. This is not correct. If you think that drinking beer makes you relax you’ll adopt this modern value? But you don’t have guts to sit in front of your parents and drink with them. But can’t do that…this is called hypocrisy my friend. When you live with your friends out side your home they become your family. They will always help you no matter what the problem is. So it’s not about living in joint family. It’s not necessary that only your blood relations will come up for your help. It’s about love…where there is a love and bonding that person will help you no matter weather you have a blood relation with that person or not.
The point which matter most is that you always love and respect them from bottom of your heart irrespective of where ever you live in this world. If people start living with their parents and start thinking that they are keeping their parents away from them. Then you won’t find anybody applying for the defense forces. We do have our other responsibilities towards friends, spouse, society, nation and planet as we have our responsibilities towards our parents. We are a new generation, our parents have given us the best education. We should be thankful to our parents and god for everything they have done for us but at the same time we should not be hypocrite…and face the reality.
Absolutely agreed … but the point here is not being hypocrite … but being courteus to anyone and everyone in world .. and sometimes people like us living in the modern society are polite to people in our modern world but we completely forget those who have made us capable of being in the society that we belog to today … You would get a feel of what I am trying to say after you read http://blog.nitinkumarjain.in/?p=46
Absolutely agreed … but the point here is not being hypocrite … but being courteus to anyone and everyone in world .. and sometimes people like us living in the modern society are polite to people in our modern world but we completely forget those who have made us capable of being in the society that we belog to today … You would get a feel of what I am trying to say after you read http://blog.nitinkumarjain.in/?p=46
NKJ,
You haven’t answered some questions posed to you by Sandeep nevertheless it was enriching to know you by your blog.
But I am disappointed by the way you put forth your view point in response.
Let me pose you a question:
Did you feel god always did right to you?
If you feel in your heart the answer as Yes.
Then replace God with you parents and replace you with people around you like your brother,wife.
When they feel like you are feeling now then If they confront them you will surely feel offended as they are your parents…
this should not be the case, every being has the right to ask from god, when unsatisfied put forth the disappointments when it happens practically i.e ur parentsit appears you feel the other person has committed a crime!!
This is where you have to come into picture as to build a bridge between them and your god(parents). the agreed upon viewpoint should be the one which is easily accepted by all not that the elders will always have the way or saying that they can’t change the other person have to… This is what exactly what hurts the other person as he/she has put faith in you to make their viewpoint and feelings clear.
Then you say nobody understands me same is the case with other person…. Crying,Ignoring or trying stupid measures like alcohol is what I call ESCAPISM. Things don’t improve on passage on time it creates scars in heart of people then they resign to their fate.
what matters is practical decisions and their implementation before its too late.
I assume you are that kind of person who must have thought of running away or ending life when faced with situations demanding immediate action for ex- Imposing your wife’s wishes on your parents for long.
but reverse must not have bothered you not withstanding she may have brought up in different environment and may have a different view of thinking.
It is just an example as i do not know you or your wife but going life experiences I took that example…
Meanwhile, keep blogging and sometimes take time out from God’s (your parebts )devotion to see world’s order as you were not here as successful as you are if your parents were devoted to the Heavenly god and went after every one who offended their god…
NKJ,
You haven’t answered some questions posed to you by Sandeep nevertheless it was enriching to know you by your blog.
But I am disappointed by the way you put forth your view point in response.
Let me pose you a question:
Did you feel god always did right to you?
If you feel in your heart the answer as Yes.
Then replace God with you parents and replace you with people around you like your brother,wife.
When they feel like you are feeling now then If they confront them you will surely feel offended as they are your parents…
this should not be the case, every being has the right to ask from god, when unsatisfied put forth the disappointments when it happens practically i.e ur parentsit appears you feel the other person has committed a crime!!
This is where you have to come into picture as to build a bridge between them and your god(parents). the agreed upon viewpoint should be the one which is easily accepted by all not that the elders will always have the way or saying that they can’t change the other person have to… This is what exactly what hurts the other person as he/she has put faith in you to make their viewpoint and feelings clear.
Then you say nobody understands me same is the case with other person…. Crying,Ignoring or trying stupid measures like alcohol is what I call ESCAPISM. Things don’t improve on passage on time it creates scars in heart of people then they resign to their fate.
what matters is practical decisions and their implementation before its too late.
I assume you are that kind of person who must have thought of running away or ending life when faced with situations demanding immediate action for ex- Imposing your wife’s wishes on your parents for long.
but reverse must not have bothered you not withstanding she may have brought up in different environment and may have a different view of thinking.
It is just an example as i do not know you or your wife but going life experiences I took that example…
Meanwhile, keep blogging and sometimes take time out from God’s (your parebts )devotion to see world’s order as you were not here as successful as you are if your parents were devoted to the Heavenly god and went after every one who offended their god…
Dear Mohit,
I really appreciate that you took time out to read the blog and reply it with your views.
First of all, I did not find any questions as such in Mr. Sandeep’s comment. He has only expressed his opinion. And I respect all differences of opinions.
Let me elaborate myself a little more as I think my write-ups have failed to convey you the actual point that I was trying to make ….
I agree with what Mr Sandeep has written that we should be thankful to our parents for what they have done for us. But how should we convey this message to them. You tell me, should we tell them “Thank you Mom and Dad†and forget all the pains that they underwent to bring us up the way we are today. I never said we are not responsible to the friends, society, nation or planet, but do you really think spending 12 hours in office + 2 hours with your friends/society and rest 8 hours your personal work/rest and leaving your parents alone at home without having to know what is happening with them, without having to know that they need you the most, without having to know that they have spent their life time to bring us up and you are doing nothing.
I have seen people leaving their existing family and starting a new family abroad or anywhere else whereas they should be extending their existing family. They don’t even bother to know the well being of their parents though they love and respect them from bottom of their heart. What is the point in loving like this? We are setting a wrong example for the next generation. There is a very popular quotation on this, I don’t know who has written it but it is “By the time we realize the importance of our parents we have ourselves become parents making our children understand the importance of parentsâ€
Working in defense forces is altogether a different thing from living away from your parents or even living with them without bothering is like living away.
I am sure you have watched the movie “Pyar Ka Mandirâ€. That used to be a rarest of rare thing 20 years ago but the character that Raj Kiran and Sachin portrayed in the movie is a very common phenomenon in everyone today.
Now lets see the another view on this. Our parents are God to us, there is no second theory on it but they themselves are human being. And as human beings everyone is bound to make mistakes. And they are no different. The most blunder mistake that was ever done by a father was by Dashrat who asked his son Rama to spend his 14 years in forest that could have been more glorious if he had stayed in Ayodhya as the King but Rama obliged his fathers decision. I know you are wondering that they were Gods and they were on earth for that only and we are not Gods. But believe me friend that was the height of being obedient. Today you cannot even imagine it. I would be lying if I say I would do that if asked. It’s not at all possible today. But leaving that, you tell me how you would react to your parents if you think they are wrong. Just tell me what would be your reaction and course of action. That certainly would not be to curse them, leave them behind and you going ahead reaching to the heights of your success and ignoring them all through out. That would be unfair to them or isn’t it??
I completely understand your point and agree to it as well, but tell me when we do something today, do we take their view points no because we always think that what we are doing is correct and what the other person is doing is not correct. It is true in everybody’s sense. We do not put ourselves in others shoes to know what the other person is thinking and I am saying it is true for everyone for me too as I am not GOD too.
I don’t know who you are but certainly know the context you are talking in, but there are always 2 sides of the coin and we have to understand both the sides before deciding upon any one theory. Of course alcohol is escapism and as I said before I am a normal human being.
I don’t know why we are discussing so much about the importance of our parents in our lives whereas this should be in the genes of at least every Indian as upbringing in India is a lot different from rest of the world.
A family is a very vital keyword for everyone to be associated with, and unlucky are those who do not have the feel of it.
Dear Mohit,
I really appreciate that you took time out to read the blog and reply it with your views.
First of all, I did not find any questions as such in Mr. Sandeep’s comment. He has only expressed his opinion. And I respect all differences of opinions.
Let me elaborate myself a little more as I think my write-ups have failed to convey you the actual point that I was trying to make ….
I agree with what Mr Sandeep has written that we should be thankful to our parents for what they have done for us. But how should we convey this message to them. You tell me, should we tell them “Thank you Mom and Dad†and forget all the pains that they underwent to bring us up the way we are today. I never said we are not responsible to the friends, society, nation or planet, but do you really think spending 12 hours in office + 2 hours with your friends/society and rest 8 hours your personal work/rest and leaving your parents alone at home without having to know what is happening with them, without having to know that they need you the most, without having to know that they have spent their life time to bring us up and you are doing nothing.
I have seen people leaving their existing family and starting a new family abroad or anywhere else whereas they should be extending their existing family. They don’t even bother to know the well being of their parents though they love and respect them from bottom of their heart. What is the point in loving like this? We are setting a wrong example for the next generation. There is a very popular quotation on this, I don’t know who has written it but it is “By the time we realize the importance of our parents we have ourselves become parents making our children understand the importance of parentsâ€
Working in defense forces is altogether a different thing from living away from your parents or even living with them without bothering is like living away.
I am sure you have watched the movie “Pyar Ka Mandirâ€. That used to be a rarest of rare thing 20 years ago but the character that Raj Kiran and Sachin portrayed in the movie is a very common phenomenon in everyone today.
Now lets see the another view on this. Our parents are God to us, there is no second theory on it but they themselves are human being. And as human beings everyone is bound to make mistakes. And they are no different. The most blunder mistake that was ever done by a father was by Dashrat who asked his son Rama to spend his 14 years in forest that could have been more glorious if he had stayed in Ayodhya as the King but Rama obliged his fathers decision. I know you are wondering that they were Gods and they were on earth for that only and we are not Gods. But believe me friend that was the height of being obedient. Today you cannot even imagine it. I would be lying if I say I would do that if asked. It’s not at all possible today. But leaving that, you tell me how you would react to your parents if you think they are wrong. Just tell me what would be your reaction and course of action. That certainly would not be to curse them, leave them behind and you going ahead reaching to the heights of your success and ignoring them all through out. That would be unfair to them or isn’t it??
I completely understand your point and agree to it as well, but tell me when we do something today, do we take their view points no because we always think that what we are doing is correct and what the other person is doing is not correct. It is true in everybody’s sense. We do not put ourselves in others shoes to know what the other person is thinking and I am saying it is true for everyone for me too as I am not GOD too.
I don’t know who you are but certainly know the context you are talking in, but there are always 2 sides of the coin and we have to understand both the sides before deciding upon any one theory. Of course alcohol is escapism and as I said before I am a normal human being.
I don’t know why we are discussing so much about the importance of our parents in our lives whereas this should be in the genes of at least every Indian as upbringing in India is a lot different from rest of the world.
A family is a very vital keyword for everyone to be associated with, and unlucky are those who do not have the feel of it.
I truly appreciate your view point and the way you have put forward your point. You said correctly that one needs to know the 2 sides of the coin.
I now knew one (your side) , try to know the other if there is a way. I put forth my argument entirely based on the perception not that I know the context as you think.
It is nice knowing you through blogs though..
I truly appreciate your view point and the way you have put forward your point. You said correctly that one needs to know the 2 sides of the coin.
I now knew one (your side) , try to know the other if there is a way. I put forth my argument entirely based on the perception not that I know the context as you think.
It is nice knowing you through blogs though..
NKJ,
I appriciate evone’s [point of view but one thing I want to knw from NKJ,u said in ur blog “I have seen people leaving their existing family and starting a new family abroad or anywhere else whereas they should be extending their existing family. They don’t even bother to know the well being of their parents though they love and respect them from bottom of their heart.”If you get an oppurtunity to go abroad or get a better oppurtunity say some where else but not near your house ,I mean you have to leave your parents and house then won’t you accept that oppurtunity?Wont you take your wife and children with you and start a new life there?Haven’t you dreamt of going abroad or for better oppurtunity?or you simply look for those oppurtunity where you’ll stay with your parents ?
NKJ,
I appriciate evone’s [point of view but one thing I want to knw from NKJ,u said in ur blog “I have seen people leaving their existing family and starting a new family abroad or anywhere else whereas they should be extending their existing family. They don’t even bother to know the well being of their parents though they love and respect them from bottom of their heart.”If you get an oppurtunity to go abroad or get a better oppurtunity say some where else but not near your house ,I mean you have to leave your parents and house then won’t you accept that oppurtunity?Wont you take your wife and children with you and start a new life there?Haven’t you dreamt of going abroad or for better oppurtunity?or you simply look for those oppurtunity where you’ll stay with your parents ?
No one should ever plan to settle down away from their family and home as long as possible. But ofcourse for business purposes, everyone should be open for short visits.
No one should ever plan to settle down away from their family and home as long as possible. But ofcourse for business purposes, everyone should be open for short visits.
Here you go Mr NKJ whether the visit is short term or long term you are also like every one else who go away from their family spl parents and start a new life ,so stop blaming others for doing that my friend as I have seen people sacrifising their career and life for their parents because at that point of time they needed them the most.i am sure you will definetly wont miss if an oppurtunity comes your way…so rather than pointing a finger towards anybody else first look at yourself.
Here you go Mr NKJ whether the visit is short term or long term you are also like every one else who go away from their family spl parents and start a new life ,so stop blaming others for doing that my friend as I have seen people sacrifising their career and life for their parents because at that point of time they needed them the most.i am sure you will definetly wont miss if an oppurtunity comes your way…so rather than pointing a finger towards anybody else first look at yourself.
I did not get it. Please elaborate yourself. Did you read my response carefully?
I did not get it. Please elaborate yourself. Did you read my response carefully?
Yes I have read your response.I am not talking ab others and infact I havn’t asked you wat other shld do or should not do, as its their life.This decision shld based on and vary from individual to individual but one should not blame other wat they have done.Going away from family always starts from short visit and then get extended.I just want to tell you that stop blaming other for what they hv done or what they r doing and time will answer this what will you do if something happens of this sort with you whether u’ll go by as per ur plan to stay with ur parents or u’ll also walk awya from them.
It was nice reading ur blog and the comments given by others also.
Yes I have read your response.I am not talking ab others and infact I havn’t asked you wat other shld do or should not do, as its their life.This decision shld based on and vary from individual to individual but one should not blame other wat they have done.Going away from family always starts from short visit and then get extended.I just want to tell you that stop blaming other for what they hv done or what they r doing and time will answer this what will you do if something happens of this sort with you whether u’ll go by as per ur plan to stay with ur parents or u’ll also walk awya from them.
It was nice reading ur blog and the comments given by others also.
You are absolutely correct by saying that I should not dictate others what they shud do and what they shud not .. It is absolutely their life ..I am not at all blaming others .. It is just my personal views and you can absolutely disagree with it… It is just a perception my dear friend … Who said it only starts from short visits ..it sometimes end on short visits … And for your kind information I will stay with them not because I will have to show you something or give you some sort of answers… okk …
Although I guess, you look to be very excited to be away with your family .. or something..
Anyways, it was nice talking to everyone …
take care
-NKJ
You are absolutely correct by saying that I should not dictate others what they shud do and what they shud not .. It is absolutely their life ..I am not at all blaming others .. It is just my personal views and you can absolutely disagree with it… It is just a perception my dear friend … Who said it only starts from short visits ..it sometimes end on short visits … And for your kind information I will stay with them not because I will have to show you something or give you some sort of answers… okk …
Although I guess, you look to be very excited to be away with your family .. or something..
Anyways, it was nice talking to everyone …
take care
-NKJ
One thing I like to add here. Once you get married its very important to make a balance between wife and parents.
If its your parents have made u what u are today,then its your wife is one who will make what u will be in your old age( which is also same as child).
So guys over here, wifes are also not less respectable then parents, as she is also going to be a mother and our childs will get the nature according to all her internal feelings.
So if you want a good future learn to please your wifes, of coures past(parents) are important but also dont mess with your future.
After all wife is one who has left her parent and is taking care of your parents, so if you want her to take better care of your parent, yuo care for them.This is one thing that people dont understand.
Thnaks to my X girl friend who made me realise this,when I was fed up with my wife and went to make love with my X.She treated me well, and due to her now I leas a happly married life, with kids.
One thing I like to add here. Once you get married its very important to make a balance between wife and parents.
If its your parents have made u what u are today,then its your wife is one who will make what u will be in your old age( which is also same as child).
So guys over here, wifes are also not less respectable then parents, as she is also going to be a mother and our childs will get the nature according to all her internal feelings.
So if you want a good future learn to please your wifes, of coures past(parents) are important but also dont mess with your future.
After all wife is one who has left her parent and is taking care of your parents, so if you want her to take better care of your parent, yuo care for them.This is one thing that people dont understand.
Thnaks to my X girl friend who made me realise this,when I was fed up with my wife and went to make love with my X.She treated me well, and due to her now I leas a happly married life, with kids.
I completely agree.
I completely agree.
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